This past weekend was a doozy with multiple events snarling traffic and allowing every preference to be pacified. There was a blues festival, an anti-war rally, the love parade, the Folsom street fair, the opera, the now and zen concert, the 49’ers game, a pyrotechnics convention, approximately 75 weddings, the Green Day concert, and major construction to the Bay Bridge. It was so busy I had no time to eat, let alone piss. I had a lot of interesting fares:
A couple from Alabama who lived in Presidio from 1966-1970 and hadn’t been back since were amazed at how much the city had changed.
One woman who got lockjaw from eating shrimp explained all her dietary peculiarities to me.
A private investigator that was searching for some guys’ fiancée who ran off with his best friend and half his marijuana crop asked me to point out a Honda prelude if we passed one.
A teacher told me that SF has the nations highest % of public teachers sending their own kids to private schools.
A German guy told me I was a great driver and how on the autobahn he has driven 280km/hr.
A young mom and her baby boy get in the cab and after a few blocks she asks me to go back to retrieve something she forgot. She leaves the boy in the back seat and he starts crying so I showed him pictures of hot air balloons in the Travel section of Sunday paper and it works.
A muscle bound gay guy I picked up post-fair at a packed 1015 Folsom told me 95% of the guys at the club use steroids and that’s why the club was so hot; cause steroids heat you up and eventually burn up your insides.
A stripper with a floral name complained about the losers who confide to her with their own relationship problems and asked me twice for pot and offered me a swig of vodka.
A gay guy was telling his friends how he has to testify in front of investigators in Texas for a friend who is straight but is trying to get out of the marines by claiming to be gay. Apparently anal sex is a dishonorable discharge and oral sex is an honorable discharge.
A very drunk couple from Denver wanted me to double back to Hobsons Choice on Haight street so he can retrieve a very drunk girl who he wants to have a threesome with. So they are all in the back and he’s flubbing the small talk and the other girl is only interested in girl on girl and so those two start making out and when we finally arrive in Pacific Heights they don’t have money so we go to corner store where the guy takes 6 minutes to get some money and the other girl gets out of cab and the one in the cab starts touching me and telling me how she hates lesbians and then they’re all in the cab again and we go back to the heights address and the original couple bolt on the other girl and she’s left with me asking “ why did they leave me, can you tell me what just happened?”
I tell her I can’t but I can take her somewhere else and I finally do after too much deliberation.
Tuesday, September 27, 2005
Monday, September 19, 2005
Sunday Sunday
When i picked up my cab the day drivers were claiming the airport was a fly-through. I never do this, but today was Sunday so i deadheaded it to SFO, waited 20 minutes and was on my way to the Savoy hotel with British newleyweds. When they saw the first gas station in town they were surprised at how cheap gas was; "it's a pound a liter back home". Thats like $7, and we're complaining? They're in town for the typical Euro-vacation: SF-Yosemite-Vegas-LA.
Got flagged by 3 young people in upper haight with a used TV. They are evacuees from New Orleans and they are now enrolled at USF. With vouchers from Goodwill they got coats and a TV. One of them went on and on about how much he hates TV and that he bought one of those universal remotes that will turn off any TV and back at school in nawolans he'd turn off evry TV on campus.
Two ladies with shopping bags took the shortest fare in a while: the Palace hotel to the Argent hotel. It took 12 seconds and cost $6. If i could do that all night i'd be a rich man.
A beautiful young Algerian mother with 2 young babies sang "Frere' a Jacques" until the youngest stopped crying and i almost started crying with kind memories of my mom and dad doing the same.
Picked up this couple at the Cannery going to the Richmond. The whole trip he told me how he got bit my a mosquito last summer, got real sick, paralised in his face, went bankrupt, and lived to tell a cabbie about being careful with West Nile.
A big fat black drag queen said i had a nice face and the new Octavia street boulevard is bad design.
Four very drunk San Jose-ers went from XYZ to Pink and three of them smoked with windows down and one kept asking me to turn up the heat.
Gave a ride to a sexy and smart Chilean wine dealer and she said she was heading to spring time south of the equator.
People don't realize how much they smell, either from garlic, or alcohol, or sex club, or kitchen grease.
A horrible accident shut down 101south after midnight. a guy tried to run across the freeway near Silver st. exit and one cab spun trying to avoid him and totalled itself against the retaining wall and the next cab killed him. A slew of cars perpetuated the carnage and it was shut down for 2 hours.
Got flagged by 3 young people in upper haight with a used TV. They are evacuees from New Orleans and they are now enrolled at USF. With vouchers from Goodwill they got coats and a TV. One of them went on and on about how much he hates TV and that he bought one of those universal remotes that will turn off any TV and back at school in nawolans he'd turn off evry TV on campus.
Two ladies with shopping bags took the shortest fare in a while: the Palace hotel to the Argent hotel. It took 12 seconds and cost $6. If i could do that all night i'd be a rich man.
A beautiful young Algerian mother with 2 young babies sang "Frere' a Jacques" until the youngest stopped crying and i almost started crying with kind memories of my mom and dad doing the same.
Picked up this couple at the Cannery going to the Richmond. The whole trip he told me how he got bit my a mosquito last summer, got real sick, paralised in his face, went bankrupt, and lived to tell a cabbie about being careful with West Nile.
A big fat black drag queen said i had a nice face and the new Octavia street boulevard is bad design.
Four very drunk San Jose-ers went from XYZ to Pink and three of them smoked with windows down and one kept asking me to turn up the heat.
Gave a ride to a sexy and smart Chilean wine dealer and she said she was heading to spring time south of the equator.
People don't realize how much they smell, either from garlic, or alcohol, or sex club, or kitchen grease.
A horrible accident shut down 101south after midnight. a guy tried to run across the freeway near Silver st. exit and one cab spun trying to avoid him and totalled itself against the retaining wall and the next cab killed him. A slew of cars perpetuated the carnage and it was shut down for 2 hours.
Saturday, September 10, 2005
First Friday night
The Octavia Street Boulevard is open for business. From the light at Page st. heading south its timed lights and a swell of a hill to a smooth onramp.. 101 all the way and the 2 lanes make all the miserable fools coming off the corkscrew approach of South Van Ness look like muni riders..
So its friday and i'm ready to work, its always busy friday unless its thanksgiving or easter or some such family holiday where more people leave the city then come in..
Its four in the afternoon and its raining lightly in the bayview, which seems unusual for what is now supposed to be our summer in San Francisco..
First ride is an old lady on Mission going 6 blocks, then a dude picking up his fixed car at BMW, then a drive empty all the way to Ferry building where i get a street artist who got his car towed on the Embarcadero, so i take him to the hall of justice and console him on his lost $200.. cruise up to Market and 7th and pickup mom grandma and two 3year old twins, they are freaked out and tell me the whole gorey story of witnessing another 3year old lose his leg on the back door of a muni bus in front of Glide church, apparently the door shut on his leg and they couldn't extricate him and had to cut his leg off, the little boy said there was blood all over and they didn't seem that traumatized when they started bopping each on the head yelling "you the punk"
Then got this hottest girl in a month for a ride to Tsunami from Soma and i talked to her about the lighting of City Hall. Its red and green for the opera opening and i remenisced all the colors in past history and she suggested purple.
At Union/Columbus this guy waves me down and i stop and notice that he seems to have wet his pants but its hard to tell these days with stained and bleached jeans all the rage. So before i can leave this guy in my exhaust he gets in and asks me if i can go to San Anselmo. He seems very drunk and i smell something strange but i lower the window and talk about baseball while heading over the bridge. I learn through his cell phone conversation what i can, because of his thick Irish , that
he turned the corner and woke up later and he's not sure what happened but he's got a nasty abrasion on his arm and either he blacked or got beat up and ended up wetting his pants, either way he was cordial and generous by giving me a Franklin for a Grant on the meter.
Back in the city i ended up in the loop of North Beach-Marina. Drunk frat guys and soused sorority chicks.
In Noe Valley i picked up a New Orleans Evacuee and her 3 pretty gay boys and took them to the Cafe and 20 minutes later in the Castro i rode two newlywed gay guys to the Endup and they too were New Orleans Evacuees. They grew up in NO and had never left and moved here to SF 2 days ago. They were not happy to hear that bars close in Cali at 1:45.
Its the end of my shift and i get greedy for one last fare so i pick up two young women with back packs at 3rd/mission and they want to find a cheap hotel. we go to all the Union Square youth hostels and YMCA and there no room for these stranded travellers from Glen Falls, NY. Their car broke down and died in Red Bluffs and they had to stay with nice mechanics there for 2 days. In order to get to Eureka where a friend lived and was going to help them make enough money in 2 weeks to afford a plane ticket home they had to take a bus to Sacramento and another to SF where tomorrow they take another to Eureka. We finally found them 2 bunks for $44 at hostel in alley off Folsom st. and i tried to tell them not to give me a tip because they said they were broke but they insisted and i ended up with a 4$ tip on top of another good fare which put me over my friday night quota but i was late and when i checked in i got reprimanded for being tardy and i gave him the good samaritan speel about helping two girls from upstate NY lost and bedless in the big city and he asked me if they were at least good looking and i answered no, not really.
Another shift finished and it only gets better as i drive home in my personal car. I take the Duboce exit but as i'm appraoching the split for 101/80 the caltrans truck is pulling all the cones opening the previously closed skyway.. Is it open?
I take my chance on the deserted highway and at 2:35 in the morning on the 10th of September i become the first car to exit on the Market/Octavia freeway ramp. green lights all the way to Fell street and in no time i am home in lower Haight trolling for a parking space, which ends up taking 25 minutes and one stop from a cop thinking my search for parking suspicious behaviour. She lets me go on after i tell her"looking for parking"
So its friday and i'm ready to work, its always busy friday unless its thanksgiving or easter or some such family holiday where more people leave the city then come in..
Its four in the afternoon and its raining lightly in the bayview, which seems unusual for what is now supposed to be our summer in San Francisco..
First ride is an old lady on Mission going 6 blocks, then a dude picking up his fixed car at BMW, then a drive empty all the way to Ferry building where i get a street artist who got his car towed on the Embarcadero, so i take him to the hall of justice and console him on his lost $200.. cruise up to Market and 7th and pickup mom grandma and two 3year old twins, they are freaked out and tell me the whole gorey story of witnessing another 3year old lose his leg on the back door of a muni bus in front of Glide church, apparently the door shut on his leg and they couldn't extricate him and had to cut his leg off, the little boy said there was blood all over and they didn't seem that traumatized when they started bopping each on the head yelling "you the punk"
Then got this hottest girl in a month for a ride to Tsunami from Soma and i talked to her about the lighting of City Hall. Its red and green for the opera opening and i remenisced all the colors in past history and she suggested purple.
At Union/Columbus this guy waves me down and i stop and notice that he seems to have wet his pants but its hard to tell these days with stained and bleached jeans all the rage. So before i can leave this guy in my exhaust he gets in and asks me if i can go to San Anselmo. He seems very drunk and i smell something strange but i lower the window and talk about baseball while heading over the bridge. I learn through his cell phone conversation what i can, because of his thick Irish , that
he turned the corner and woke up later and he's not sure what happened but he's got a nasty abrasion on his arm and either he blacked or got beat up and ended up wetting his pants, either way he was cordial and generous by giving me a Franklin for a Grant on the meter.
Back in the city i ended up in the loop of North Beach-Marina. Drunk frat guys and soused sorority chicks.
In Noe Valley i picked up a New Orleans Evacuee and her 3 pretty gay boys and took them to the Cafe and 20 minutes later in the Castro i rode two newlywed gay guys to the Endup and they too were New Orleans Evacuees. They grew up in NO and had never left and moved here to SF 2 days ago. They were not happy to hear that bars close in Cali at 1:45.
Its the end of my shift and i get greedy for one last fare so i pick up two young women with back packs at 3rd/mission and they want to find a cheap hotel. we go to all the Union Square youth hostels and YMCA and there no room for these stranded travellers from Glen Falls, NY. Their car broke down and died in Red Bluffs and they had to stay with nice mechanics there for 2 days. In order to get to Eureka where a friend lived and was going to help them make enough money in 2 weeks to afford a plane ticket home they had to take a bus to Sacramento and another to SF where tomorrow they take another to Eureka. We finally found them 2 bunks for $44 at hostel in alley off Folsom st. and i tried to tell them not to give me a tip because they said they were broke but they insisted and i ended up with a 4$ tip on top of another good fare which put me over my friday night quota but i was late and when i checked in i got reprimanded for being tardy and i gave him the good samaritan speel about helping two girls from upstate NY lost and bedless in the big city and he asked me if they were at least good looking and i answered no, not really.
Another shift finished and it only gets better as i drive home in my personal car. I take the Duboce exit but as i'm appraoching the split for 101/80 the caltrans truck is pulling all the cones opening the previously closed skyway.. Is it open?
I take my chance on the deserted highway and at 2:35 in the morning on the 10th of September i become the first car to exit on the Market/Octavia freeway ramp. green lights all the way to Fell street and in no time i am home in lower Haight trolling for a parking space, which ends up taking 25 minutes and one stop from a cop thinking my search for parking suspicious behaviour. She lets me go on after i tell her"looking for parking"
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